Happiness is an interesting word. It is something that has been in my mind a lot recently.. You see, I have had a few issues in connecting with my wife on any level recently. It has led to a lack of happiness. I have been reading through many articles recently and it has led me to a bit of a question or disagreement with what these people say.
Most of the articles I read state that you should not get your happiness from your relationship. It should all be from you and that any of your happiness coming from the relationship is not full happiness at best because it can always not be there. I do agree that you should not derive all of your happiness from your significant other as you are two different people and have different interests. The rest of it I argue though.
When I got married I gave myself to my wife completely. That includes my happiness as well as my love, my respect and many other things. In my relationship I cannot have true respect of my wife or others if I do not treat her with the type of respect that I want and that she deserves. If I did otherwise it would affect the respect outside of our relationship. The same is true of Love. If I can't give her my whole heart for her to love and cherish and show her that I love her by helping around the house, telling her I Love her and letting her feel it. Then I have not entered into this relationship giving of my self wholly and unconditionally. Then why is happiness not the same? If I am unable to keep my wife happy then should I not lose some of my happiness? I believe this last part to be a yes. If the two of you are not sharing in your happiness together then you cannot fully enjoy your own happiness outside of the relationship. You are each others rock through good times and bad, in sickness and in health, in life and in death. If you are not also a good part of each others happiness then I think there is work to be done.
Most of the articles I read state that you should not get your happiness from your relationship. It should all be from you and that any of your happiness coming from the relationship is not full happiness at best because it can always not be there. I do agree that you should not derive all of your happiness from your significant other as you are two different people and have different interests. The rest of it I argue though.
When I got married I gave myself to my wife completely. That includes my happiness as well as my love, my respect and many other things. In my relationship I cannot have true respect of my wife or others if I do not treat her with the type of respect that I want and that she deserves. If I did otherwise it would affect the respect outside of our relationship. The same is true of Love. If I can't give her my whole heart for her to love and cherish and show her that I love her by helping around the house, telling her I Love her and letting her feel it. Then I have not entered into this relationship giving of my self wholly and unconditionally. Then why is happiness not the same? If I am unable to keep my wife happy then should I not lose some of my happiness? I believe this last part to be a yes. If the two of you are not sharing in your happiness together then you cannot fully enjoy your own happiness outside of the relationship. You are each others rock through good times and bad, in sickness and in health, in life and in death. If you are not also a good part of each others happiness then I think there is work to be done.